Posted by: aceanderic | November 2, 2008

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 2 (day 175)

There are two different kind of commends I’ve heard about Eric coming home; everyone means well and the differences goes something like this;
1. From friends and family who doesn’t have any experience or minimal knowledge about brain injury: “I am so happy to hear how Eric is progressing. You much be so excited to finally have him home! Keep up the good spirit, you’re doing a great job.”
2. From a brain injury survivor, spouse or a professional in the field: “Stock up your storage with food, and supplies because you’ll get stranded at the house for a while. What kind of support do you have, you’ll need a big network that can help. You cannot do this alone. One day at a time; it’s the only way you can face this right now.”

Eric has done a tremendous progress, and yet he has a very, very long road ahead. It’s amazing how damaged your body can get in just a blink of a second. Eric’s life will never be the same; this has affected virtually every area of his life — including his relationship with family members, friends, our dogs, myself, and others close to Eric.

I know many of his friends find themselves struggling to cope with changes in his behavior and physical limitations. I know Eric is struggling too to adjust. If you find it difficult, think about how hard it must be for Eric. Some of you will choose to walk away from us, and some already have. I’ve been told this is the nature of the injury; it’s too much for some to understand and cope with, so therefore they will walk away from it. And at the same time, distance friends will be closer then ever. New friends will fill in and time will move on. I will not judge you if you walk away, and I will accept your decision. My hope is to have enough friends and family member that can help us through the rough time we’re facing after discharge from RIO. I can not do this alone.



  1. wish i could be there….

  2. You’re starting a passage in your life that I’m know you could not have even imagined a year ago. I’m sure you are happy to have him coming home, but it’s got to be overwhelming. My father is a Parkinson’s patient. When the brain fails it’s quite a ride. My mother is tied to the house more often than not. Life has gotten a little easier since I started dating a nurse who has willingly joined in our merry band of caretakers. (I know that’s not an option for you) 😉 Stock up the house, if Safeway delivers in your area, get a account. works too. That will help a lot.

    I’m one of those new folks from afar, but if ever in the area, I promise to ring you up and do whatever I can. And you can count on my support from the SF Bay Area.

  3. Ace,

    I read your blog daily and wish I could do something to help you and Eric get through this. I don’t have the ability to contribute financially (I come from the mortgage industry too and basically my income is gone) but I can offer my time. If you need someone to do your grocery shopping, run errands, clean your house or anything else please let me know.


  4. Hi Ace,
    I knew Eric from working downtown too and had some wonderful conversations with him about hiking, berners and life. I’ve got a berner too and we bumped into you and your two dogs one summer day at Wilshire Park.
    I can help you with the dogs. Dog walking? Weekends and some weekday mornings, if we arrange that in advance.
    My thoughts and hopes are with you!

  5. Vi finns här och sänder en konstant ström av bamsekramar till er båda även om de vore bättre från närmare håll förstås.

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